Fear of Heights
Fear gripped my heart. My palms were sweaty and I felt cold all over. I was in Mine's View Park looking over Baguio's losing battle against urbanization. My friend asked me to step up to a rock no higher than one foot. But I was frozen in place. I can't seem to move without my friend's help. He held my hand and helped me overcome my fear. It is funny how something so easy seemed so hard for me to do. I envied the children I saw playing around without a care, without fear.
I am afraid of heights. I cannot look down from tall buildings without feeling dizzy and cold all over. When I saw Keanu Reeves and Al Pacino in Devil's Advocate, daring life itself by standing at the ledge of a high building, boy, did I envy them ! There must be something about some people that makes them fearless in handling what I fear.
When I was in New Jersey, we went to an amusement park there called Six Flags. There was this ride that they aptly call as the 'Dare Devil Dive' or D3. At that time, I was with my friend and several members of his family all fairly younger than myself. I was ashamed to say that it was only I who was afraid and reluctant to try it. Everybody was excited about the ride.
It's a little bit similar to bungee jumping. Only on this ride, you don't fall down straight. The 'flyers' were tied lying down facing the ground. Then they were raised up to a height of 153 feet. When you get there, you get to pull a string that sets you free and flying against the wind ! I was so afraid to try it. But I forced myself to brave it and try it once. When I got my chance to do it, I was telling myself over and over again, 'What are you doing? Are you nuts?' I can't believe I was doing this. I was already freaking out halfway to the top but there's no way for me to stop it. So I just let myself loose and tried to look anywhere but down. It's amazing how small people can be from several feet above the ground. And it's frightening.
When we arrived at the top, we were signaled to get ready to pull the cord. 'Three.' 'Two.' 'One.' 'Fly!' I pulled the cord free and we were screaming our lungs out because we were suddenly falling closer and closer to the ground. Suddenly, several feet above the ground, our rope stopped our fall and we swung to and fro for several times. It was frightening. It was madness. It was fun ! I was so proud of myself.
When I got back to the Philippines, a friend of mine asked me if I wanted to try rock climbing. He had been doing it regularly at Power Up in Tandang Sora. I was curious so I came along. When I saw the wall we were going to climb, fear gripped my heart again. But I said to myself, 'If I can do D3, I can do this !'
There's the familiar signs again. Sweaty hands, cold fingers and thumping heart. Inspite of all these, I still tried it. I climbed. It's amazing how one forgets one's fear of heights once you start climbing. The only thought going through my head then was 'Where am I going to step on next? Where's my next handhold?'. I failed to reach the top twice. But I didn't let it deter me from climbing again. When I finally got to the top, I felt really good about myself. I'm glad I allowed myself to enjoy life inspite of my fear. I go to Power Up whenever I can. And each time I do, I find that I'm conquering my fear over again. I am still afraid of heights. But I'm not letting it control and stop me from having fun.
This article was published in PDI's YoungBlood on December 10, 1998
I am afraid of heights. I cannot look down from tall buildings without feeling dizzy and cold all over. When I saw Keanu Reeves and Al Pacino in Devil's Advocate, daring life itself by standing at the ledge of a high building, boy, did I envy them ! There must be something about some people that makes them fearless in handling what I fear.
When I was in New Jersey, we went to an amusement park there called Six Flags. There was this ride that they aptly call as the 'Dare Devil Dive' or D3. At that time, I was with my friend and several members of his family all fairly younger than myself. I was ashamed to say that it was only I who was afraid and reluctant to try it. Everybody was excited about the ride.
It's a little bit similar to bungee jumping. Only on this ride, you don't fall down straight. The 'flyers' were tied lying down facing the ground. Then they were raised up to a height of 153 feet. When you get there, you get to pull a string that sets you free and flying against the wind ! I was so afraid to try it. But I forced myself to brave it and try it once. When I got my chance to do it, I was telling myself over and over again, 'What are you doing? Are you nuts?' I can't believe I was doing this. I was already freaking out halfway to the top but there's no way for me to stop it. So I just let myself loose and tried to look anywhere but down. It's amazing how small people can be from several feet above the ground. And it's frightening.
When we arrived at the top, we were signaled to get ready to pull the cord. 'Three.' 'Two.' 'One.' 'Fly!' I pulled the cord free and we were screaming our lungs out because we were suddenly falling closer and closer to the ground. Suddenly, several feet above the ground, our rope stopped our fall and we swung to and fro for several times. It was frightening. It was madness. It was fun ! I was so proud of myself.
When I got back to the Philippines, a friend of mine asked me if I wanted to try rock climbing. He had been doing it regularly at Power Up in Tandang Sora. I was curious so I came along. When I saw the wall we were going to climb, fear gripped my heart again. But I said to myself, 'If I can do D3, I can do this !'
There's the familiar signs again. Sweaty hands, cold fingers and thumping heart. Inspite of all these, I still tried it. I climbed. It's amazing how one forgets one's fear of heights once you start climbing. The only thought going through my head then was 'Where am I going to step on next? Where's my next handhold?'. I failed to reach the top twice. But I didn't let it deter me from climbing again. When I finally got to the top, I felt really good about myself. I'm glad I allowed myself to enjoy life inspite of my fear. I go to Power Up whenever I can. And each time I do, I find that I'm conquering my fear over again. I am still afraid of heights. But I'm not letting it control and stop me from having fun.
This article was published in PDI's YoungBlood on December 10, 1998
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